| A prominent member of our community, Mr H. Dumpty, was critically injured yesterday evening when he fell from the wall surrounding Mary Contrary's garden. All the King's Men, an emergency medical team, arrived on the spot within minutes of the accident, but were unable to put Mr Dumpty back together again. The patient was transported to the Jack Sprat Memorial Hospital, where his condition is listed as serious. Witness say Mr Dumpty climbed to the top of the wall to try to get a look at the fames silver bells and cockleshells in Ms Contrary's garden. The aged mortar of the wall began to crumble due to the excessive weight of Mr Dumpty (he's a little on the chubby side, you know). Mr Dumpty struggled in vain to retain his balance, then tumbled into the crowd below. Ms Contrary's garden has been off limits to the public since an incident last year when Little Miss Muffet trampled to death several of the little maids all in a row when fleeing a ferocious spider. Upset by this destruction of her property, Ms Contrary erected a wall around her garden. Currently, only Ms Contrary and a few select visitors are able to view the spectacular display behind the garden wall. Public outcry has been great, as the tourist industry in Mother Goose Land has fallen since the garden has been declared off limits. Many of the members of the community are very upset by what they view as Ms Contrary's selfish attitude. |